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DDD: Screaming Bag of Cats

May 5, 2007 • Darrell Shandrow Hilliker
My name is Darrell Shandrow.  I am Karen’s husband.  I help her maintain the Karen’s Corner blog.  I and a small group of others have been enjoying Karen’s Daily Doses (KDD) she has been sending us via e-mail for more than 14 months now.  I am so glad she decided to post some of them for the entire world to see.  Once in awhile, others in the group have created their own “daily doses”.  Mine are, of course, called Darrell’s Daily Dose (DDD). 
 
Yesterday, while working, I saw a post from a customer about how troubleshooting a particularly challenging technical issue was like a “screaming bag of cats”.  The visual from that was incredibly hillarious!  I decided to get it out of my system by writing a DDD.  You’ll see how it has turned into something of a statement concerning the human rights of the blind with respect to our need for equal access to technology.   I welcome all comments to either Karen’s or my blog. You may also e-mail me at editor@blindaccessjournal.com
 
It is now May 5, 2007,
and we are not in Heaven,
It is after noon at 12:57.
Today the weather is nice,
not too hot but not cold as ice,
Try Serotek System Access that would be my advice.
Yesterday I saw something funny,
While I was working and earning money.
A customer wrote a forum post,
Unintended but comedy he did make the most.
A VPN he was trying to fix,
but he was not running UNIX,
nor was he configuring a Pix,
and I saw his post well before six.
He said troubleshooting a VpN was like a “screaming bag of cats”,
not like a squirming box of rats,
nor ten thousand screeching blind bats,
not even like a flying gnat.
This made me laugh,
Caused me to write more than a paragraph.
The visual in my head is absolutely crazy,
It is not at all hazy,
Those screaming cats certainly would not be lazy.
Imagining a bunch of cats in a huge bag,
Tails they would most certainly wag.
But the wagging isn’t at all like a dog,
or even like a hog.
No, it is more like a swish made by the cats tail,
If in a bag it would be without fail,
They’d be screaming out of here please due us bail,
We are not the U.S. mail,
we don’t want to ride the light rail,
nor on a boat sail,
and we are not whales.
We are independent cats,
Some skinny others fat,
Nor are we hats.
Us you can’t just ship,
nor whip,
and this bag we will rip,
and definitely do not give us any lip!
We want out of this bag right now,
If you don’t know we will show you how,
You do not have to trade stocks on the Dow.
Louder and louder we scream,
not for ice cream,
and not as a team.
Freedom is what we seek,
and we are not weak,
but we will not stay in this bag for a week,
Into the light we shall one day peak,
for we are not freaks.
Our cat brethren we must rejoin,
not toss a coin,
but maybe some of us do live in Desmoins.
But on we scream and fight,
Truly organize someday we just might,
and we may just bite,
for access to the world and equal participation are our right!
We must be able to read every last byte!
Now we are listening to the Eighties Vault,
On the show goes without hault.
It is on ACB Radio Interactive,
and we the blind must never be passive.
It is not the end of the world as we know it,
and we must not have a fit,
but never must we quit,
nor do as we are often told and just sit,
No, we must be a big hit.
Sometimes accessibility issues are a “screaming bag of cats”,
But on the head we must not accept those pats.
All the same we must get out of our confining bag,
and never let the rest of the world impose a gag,
nor let our rights to equal access lag,
From the challenges we must not sag,
but the bad guys we sometimes must tag.
For the cats and the dogs are fighting more,
The battle for equal access is sometimes an outright war,
Most of the blind are still poor,
and some think accessibility is a bore,
The issues just are not core,
To us many still refuse to open the door,
Access is not just a favor,
and the capabilities of the blind are not folklore.
Equal access we must be granted,
For it sometimes we have ranted,
But we hope the seeds of change are being planted.
Better accessibility can bring us more jobs,
so we can purchase food such as corn cobbs,
and into the office use our key fobs,
and on that radio gear turn those knobs,
and jobs from us inaccessibility sometimes robbs.
So, the challenges ahead of us all are great,
We manage our own fate,
and must show the entire world that we do rate!
If they can’t get out of that bag, those screaming cats would certainly dye,
We must listen to their cry,
Never be shy.

A “screaming bag of cats”, the accessibility concerns can be,
and our assistive technology comes at such a high fee,
We can’t help it we are unable to see,
We must all accept the challenge, you and me.
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